Monday, July 27, 2009

Everything Happens For A Reason

Not.

A friend of the family went to jail for shoplifting. His wife was understandably disappointed, but bravely stated, That's okay. Everything happens for a reason.

Right. The reason is he got caught stealing.

It's not that I don't believe in God, or that I don't think He has a plan for us. I'm not sure I believe in a specific plan for each of us-maybe-but at least the plan that we should all return to live with Him.

However, I like to think that I have to be a little more accountable for my own actions, for what happens to me, and around me, and exercise my free agency.

I believe that God is all powerful, but I know He doesn't force us to do things, therefore, He isn't behind everything that happens, and if something bad happens to me I can't always blame it on Him and say it must've happened for a reason. I feel like that's a cop-out, and I can't respect that. When a drunk driver killed my friends mother, what was the reason for that? "It happened for a reason" would hold up great in a court of law. The reason is, he chose to drink more than a safe amount, and then chose to get in his car. Then he chose to drive her way, and he killed her. What kind of comfort would "Everything happens for a reason" bring her children?

I am always dismayed at the number of people who try to comfort mothers who have lost their children, tell themselves everything will be okay when it really won't, and make the excuse for some mistake they have made by saying, "Everything happens for a reason."

I like to make the best out of things, meaning not repeat mistakes, grow, learn new things. My divorce, losing my brother, losing my job, car, home and boyfriend all in one year. I am so much stronger. Do I think these things "happened for a reason." No. They just did. God didn't cause these things. My husband made poor decisions, my brother had a kidney disorder, and a number of occurrences happened causing me to start over with nothing.

I like to think I did pretty well with these things. I got back on my feet, and now I have just about everything I had and more.

This I do have to give God credit for. I could not have done it without Him, but I like to give myself a little credit, too.

1 comment:

Andrea said...

A note about the example I used here: The choice that the subject made to shoplift set off a chain of reactions leading to the eventual recovery of the couple, and several other positive results. However, saying everything happens for a reason trivializes not only his choice to shoplift, but his choice to later go into recovery.